I’ve been walking by this chain link fence in my neighborhood for sometime now, enjoying a changing message posted there: “you are here” “I love you” “Hello again”. By whom, I did not know. This one says, ” In all my life I never met anyone as beautiful as you.” Each time I encounter these messages, I feel a warm glow in my chest. I smile and look around…it feels like someone is talking just to me. Thinking of this in terms of Somatic Experiencing and my nervous system, this could be called a resource or capacity….a feeling of settling, well being, “goodness” that arises spontaneously in me. I notice a spontaneous deep breath…my body likes this, and my mind too for that matter! This spontaneous deep breath means my parasympathetic nervous system is registering “safety”. As human animals, our nervous system is scanning and has a preference for noticing “threat”–even more so if we’ve experience trauma. Noticing safety and goodness widens our view and brings our nervous system into a more resilient balance.
Try practicing. When, what, how, who brings you a sense of settling and well being? Get to know your own capacity to self regulate! (And if your interested check out loveyou2.org).